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Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Calm is my watchword

When I started this process I thought I was really going to be all gang-busters with the paperwork. I really thought that if it was all just left in MY hands, it would be much better.
Maybe I'm just shutting down from the very thought of it. Maybe I'm just lazy, I don't know, but it just seems that there's so much more I could be doing.
I still haven't sent in the I600A yet. I probably should've mailed it WEEKS ago. I have it all filled out and the cash for the money order. I even have the envelope addressed, but it's still sitting here as I type, mocking me. Maybe I'm one of those people who sabotages themselves for some reason......I really want to mail this out, but I'm kind of antsy about the whole thing. Maybe I'm afraid that it's filled out wrong and they'll send it back, which will mean weeks or months of delays. Maybe they'll turn us down for some reason.
........You know, putting it in black and white, I think that's exactly what it is. As long as I have it here with me, it's all OK. I mean, it looks like it's done right. It's all offical looking and so pretty with our signatures! Surely there isn't anything wrong with it. Surely they can't turn us down.
I seriously need to learn to give up some control!!!! I obviously have MAJOR control issues!
Honestly, though, things are progressing. I've scheduled our physical exams, which will be in 2 weeks. We're going to apply for our passports this Friday. (we're getting our pictures taken today--say cheese!) I've gotten our county birth and marriage certificates. I even have our 2005 tax return done and mailed out. everything is going to be OK.
We also have our home visit scheduled for next Monday. I'm actually NOT nervous about that. Which, of course leads me to believe I SHOULD be nervous, and what the heck's going to happen because I'm NOT nervous?! (so now I guess I AM nervous----)
We're starting to get busy with paperwork now, which is a good thing. This is exactly what I wanted to be doing when I thought we were never going to get moving. So, I AM happy that we're moving along.
Well, I'm off. I'm going to go get my money order and mail my I600A out TODAY! grrr!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

"We want to adopt from China because......"

Tonight is our first home study meeting. Because we live in the middle of nowhere we need to drive an hour and a half to our "neutral" meeting place. Which, because we live in the middle of central AND eastern time, we'll be traveling to a different time zone. Which means, we'll get home LATE!! Oh well, I guess I should be used to it. When I have to go to another city entirely to even grocery shop and a trip to Target is a day's journey, you kind of learn to deal.
We're supposed to have a 2 hour meeting. My husband and I will be interviewed together and then we'll be split up (like on any good cop show to make sure we've got our stories straight!) Come to think of it, maybe it's a GOOD thing we've got such a long drive!!! Lots of time to quiz each other!
We have SO MANY questions though, I can see us being there for HOURS!!
**when do we send this form, how soon should we get this done, should I start playing the lottery now?!
Our SW seems like a very nice lady. She seems to have a good sense of humor, which goes a looong way with me. Nothing I can stand less than a humorless cold fish!
I don't know how I'm going to get ANY sleep tonight. Can't take me anywhere. If I'm out of my element, I get all geeked up! Last week we had people over and I couldn't sleep for 3 hours after they left! I really need to get out more!! Good thing I'm getting out of the house tonight---but I'll just pay for it tomorrow!!

Friday, February 17, 2006

Holy Paperwork Batman!!

We have now officially received ALL of our paperwork, forms and instructions----WOO HOO!!! Now the ball is in our court-yippee???!
OK, be careful what you wish for because this seems sooooo overwhelming now!!
I'm the type of person that gets confused and stressed out over directions. Like when you need to put together a kid's toy, I always skip the directions and go straight to the picture. If I have to find "slot a" and "doohickey f" I go insane. I shut down and convince myself that I'm stupid and it's not worth it so I quit. (I know I am one attractive person!! )
So, after reading over everything (and getting over my shut down and quit mode) I thought about it all.
Now, I've been researching and studying China adoptions for months and I felf pretty confident I knew what to expect (that is until, I got exactly what I wished for!)
I have to credit all the amazing bloggers out there that I've been stalking!
I guess it's the difference between book learning and street learning. The only way to really learn something is to get out there and do it.
I have really learned so much from these people, and I am grateful to them. I really felt like I've lived what they've been through. Then, getting the paperwork yesterday, I realized what they've lived through. And I just have to say CONGRATULATIONS!!! They have been through sooo much. Wow! I just hope I'm able to survive it all and get to the point where it's all worth it.
So, anyway, after I convinced myself to try, I realized that I can do this. This is exactly what I've been preparing myself for for months. And, the most important thing is that this is the ONLY way to get my daughter home, so I'll do it. Enough said. grrrr!

Wednesday, February 15, 2006



L-O-L-A....Lola!!
Our adoption specialist called us last night-what a nice Valentine's gift!! She seems very nice and laid back.
Our first meeting is next week.
We live SO STINKIN' FAR from everywhere!!! We have to go 1 1/2 hours and travel to a different time zone to meet! Sometimes it's nice to be centrally located, but it would be really nice to be located somewhere, right in the middle of where SOMETHING is actually going on!!! By the time we get done with homestudy meetings and agency meetings, traveling to China will seem like a piece of cake! (have I mentioned that our agency is 2 1/2 hours away?) ugh!!
Any-hoo, we're getting the ball rolling. Our SW (social worker-adoption specialist) wants to get all our meetings in within a couple weeks, so that will be really nice.
STILL waiting on our stupid immigration forms. I don't know WHAT has been going on with our mail lately, but in the past 2 weeks we've only gotten mail 3 days.....somebody's just obviously torturing me!
I guess I'll just go with the plan that on Friday I'll print off the forms myself if I haven't gotten them by then. I also have to get birth certificates and marriage licences. This is the ONE time I'm glad we live in the same area as where we were born, raised and married. If we were in a different state, we'd have to send through the EVIL, DREADED MAIL for all of that. So, that's a good thing. (I need to keep reminding myself of the GOOD things!!)
Seriously, this whole process is a good thing. As my husband reminded me tonight, it's all part of getting our daughter. I swear, 2 minutes of talking with him and I feel like such a loser!! He's such a good guy. He's everything I wish I could be.....I'm glad he's on my side!!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Sigh...........

Still looking forward to hearing from our adoption specialist. Hopefully she'll call sometime this week with info. on when we can get our homestudy started.
I'm also still waiting for our immigration forms. I called on 2/1 and ordered them. by recorded message. Which begs the question, did I do it right??? Was the message received??? Did I press # or * or whatever it is that completes my order??? I think what I'm going to do is re-order them over the internet at the end of the week if I haven't received them yet. Is there a penalty or something for ordering them more than once? Is the government going to red flag me or something and think I'm a terrorist for ordering immigration forms in bulk? Maybe they'll think I'm building a Chinese army or something........
Maybe one of these days I'll have SOOOO MUCH to write about because we'll be SOOOO BUSY actually getting things done!
Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day!! I think my family is going to go out to eat tonight (thanks mom and dad!)
No cooking+ no dishes=a happy day indeed!

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Well, tomorrow is Monday. An official work day. A day where businesses make phone calls and things happen. And for the next six days, the mail will be running.
The ONE good thing about Sunday is that I know no business takes place on Sunday. I can take comfort in the fact that I can let my guard down and not expect anything to happen on Sunday. I can abandon my psycho "if I worry enough it'll happen" vigil. Come Monday-Friday though, my impatience really shines through!!!
Now we wait for our adoption specialist (social worker) to contact us. Which should be "in the next few days". We should also be expecting our next agency packet to arrive in the mail. Our I-600A forms should be getting here any day now too.
The only thing I hate waiting on more than the phone to ring is the mail to come. aaargh!!
I guess I should just be glad that we've come this far. I should be glad that we're even able to do this. I should really be glad that the family I do have with me right now can put up with me!!!
whimper and sigh..

Saturday, February 11, 2006



Friday, February 10, 2006

OK, I think I finally figured out how to add pictures! YAY!!! This blog thing takes some getting used to!
By the way, my agency called today and we're approved and our case is open and we're just about ready to get this show on the road! Not only did they call and talk to me at home, but they called and left a message at my office and emailed both my husband and me. So, about that freaked-out stressed-out thing.......I ALWAYS do that. I get all psycho about something that ends up working out just fine. But just maybe that's why it all works out....maybe getting psycho is my mojo or something!!!
Being patient and at peace is something I REALLY need to work on. Especially since I'm staring down the barrel of a couple years of WAITING and WORRYING and STRESS!!!!!!!!!
Oh well, I have flaws, what can I say?? (just don't tell my agency that......I think after reading my autobiography they might have the impression that I'm perfect...... :)

Thursday, February 09, 2006

The real waiting hasn't even begun and I'm a control-freak mess!!

We mailed our application packed last Thursday. On our set of instructions it says that when the agency receives it our case will be opened and we'll get an orientation phone call.
Maybe I'm just too literal, but it says when they receive it.
OK, I know that it takes awhile for things to get to the right people. I should've known that when they receive it, they'd need to review it. But I also thought that since we were "pre-approved" it would just make sense that we would be "APPROVED".
Well, I broke down and emailed the agency yesterday.
(The post man said it would arrive in 2 days---that means it got there Sat. or Mon., right?? So, by Wed. they should have it. BUT WAIT!!! What if something happened to it? What if it's not there? There's a big check in there and LOTS of personal information........I just HAD to at least check to see if it got to the agency.)
And that's all I wanted to know. (not "why is it taking you so freakin' long to call" or "did you lose it or something") Nope, just a quick note to make sure everything's OK.
Well, thankfully the agency emailed me back within MINUTES and said that it's all there safe and sound and it's being reviewed for approval. AAAAAHHH!!! I SWEAR that we are good enough to parent, just ask our son.......well, just make sure when you ask my son!! :)
So, now we're waiting to be approved again. Hopefully next week we'll know a little more. Hopefully we'll actually have an active case. Honestly, at this point I'm all about paperwork, fingerprinting and medical exams. ANYTHING that smacks of progress!!

Thursday, February 02, 2006

We're on our way

We mailed our application packet today:
Official application
2 signed contracts saying that we agree to anything they want to do to us
Certified check (using money that was supposed to be part of my hubby's car down payment!)
The postman said it should reach Indianapolis in 2 days.
It's so scary to send money through the mail, let alone documents that have so much personal information about us. Oh well, if the bad guys are gonna mess with you, they're gonna mess with you.
Now we wait. We wait for our agency to review everything to make sure (yet again) that we're good enough to continue with this process. We've already been "pre-approved" but I guess that doesn't count for much. The pre-approval was free, now the gloves are off, I guess.
I have no idea how long it'll take until we hear back from them.
The next step is for them to open our case and assign us our social worker. Which means in a nutshell, more paperwork, another big check followed by a HUGE check, followed by more paperwork and more waiting. Which leads me to another thought. My husband and I just saw one of those Save the Children (or some charity) commercial showing all those needy kids and I asked him why adoption takes so long? There are MILLIONS of needy kids out there. I can even almost understand the astonomical cost, I'm willing to pay it. Believe me, I can totally understand all the background checks. But WHY SO LONG??? I mean, we sign on the dotted line, we get fingerprinted and checked and re-checked and we willingly pay the fees.......let's just get on with it!! I know I'm not the most patient of people (I even admitted it on my autobiography) but the sooner we get these kids out of their current situation, the better. Doesn't that just make sense?
Anyway, we're in this for the long haul. However long it takes, we're gonna just stick with it and ride it out. What else can we do??

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